family we love :: by guest writer jacqueline schneider, the mint collective

After 22 years my grandmother (or Nana) is moving out of her lovely San Diego home. In the process of downsizing and sorting through a myriad of belongings and memorabilia she is finally parting with a lifetime of memories.  As a result of this, every time I’ve seen her the past few weeks she gives me things – things which are merely material goods to anyone else, but to our family – priceless mementos like old photos, books, music and art.  In the past 2 weeks, I must have gone through around 200 photos – most of which I have never seen before.  There were pictures of my parents’ wedding (they weren’t even of drinking age), candid shots of my Nana and Papa, tons of family gatherings with all of the grand children and extended family, assorted shots of friends over the years, animals and people who are no longer with us, and lots of pictures of everyone enjoying themselves around a table of food and drink (nothing new there-we love to eat)!  Looking at these images really got me thinking about family, who and what I consider family and for what reasons.

The relationships that have been fostered in my lifetime with my blood relatives, the ones I see and talk to on a regular basis have guided me through life thus far to shape the person I am today.  I know it sounds like a “duh” moment or something that is obvious but I think it is vital to give thanks and pay homage to the collection of people that have had a hand in the creation of your mind, body and soul.  Without my family, blood relatives, friends, animals, music and much more I would not be me.  I do not think we are one (as individuals) – we are many and when I look around, especially with the current state of the affairs the more I realize that in these times family is the only thing constant – the glue that is holding everyone together.

After this massive internal reflection and consequently reaching out to 100 + humans in my accessible network face to face and via the internet here are some ways we came up with to describe family:

“If I consider you family then I feel a strong instinctual urge to do anything and everything to ensure that you are happy and healthy. I want you to thrive and I feel completely satisfied when you do.”

“Family means unconditional love, which is the hardest love to find.  Family means stability, which is necessary to building a rock solid foundation for life.  Family means giving to those less fortunate and to the children who have every opportunity ahead of them to flourish.  Family means sacrifice and compromise for the greater good.  Family means extending yourself beyond your bloodlines.  Family means culture.  Family means community.“

“If I had to define family right now in this very moment families main function is to perpetuate society.”

“I do not assimilate my hobbies, desires and dreams in the realm of family, it def is human based.”

“Family are the people (and animals) I would do anything for and give anything and everything to without thinking twice.”

“Blood relatives – (you know, the ones you can’t choose).”

“A support structure that always has open arms.  The people that will always remind you of how much you’ve grown, how proud they are of you”

“Then there is Mum a.k.a. Mother a.k.a. The One. For me, she is everything and at times feels like the only real family I have.”

“Family is the ship that helps us sail this life better but all shipmates must understand each others place on board our voyage.”

“My family fills all the roles in my life from: love, balance, critique to employment.”

“Family is community, comfort, security, love, commitment, satisfaction, history, roots.”

“To me family is a place where you can bring your love, passion, fears, heartaches and insecurities”

“Your family teaches you the life lessons that are not taught in school. They are
there to tell you to “be safe” or “be careful” when you walk out the door.”

Upon receiving and processing this feedback from the people whom I consider family, I am genuinely honored to be in the presence of such greatness.  These words of candid honesty are exactly what family is about.

The underlying theme in all of these discussions of family over the past few weeks have lead me to believe that family is an essential part of life and something that is valued across the board.  It doesn’t matter who or what is a part of your family – be it ancestry or chance.  Family are those we hold near and dear to our hearts no matter what.  Life is short and who knows what will be next.  Tell your family you love them, let them love you and be patient.  As someone near to my heart said “keep being the light in everything you do”.  That’s the family I love.

Thank you to everyone who contributed content to this discussion on family.

This entry was posted on Thursday, May 21st, 2009 at 1:35 AM and is filed under FWL BLOG and tagged with California, collective, dj moni, family, family we love, friends we love, friendswelove.com, guest blogger, jacqueline schneider, life, love, mike vargas, mint collective, moni pineda, nuyorktricity, production company, video producers, web series, Writer. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.